So you have been dating a guy for some time and despite the fact that things are going well you do not know where you stand with him as he blows hot and cold with his affections and gives little away as to how he feels about you. Many women will analyze and over analyze the situation, seeking clues in which to affirm that 'he is serious' as though they are in denial of the true situation. This inevitably leads to heartbreak as they fail to read signs that he is just not interested. In order to give you a little insight into whether a guy is serious or not, read the following tips.
1: He calls when he says he will call - A guy who is serious about a woman will call. He will call her often and wish to talk about things in which the woman is interested in and to know about things going on in her life. He will make the time to call even if it is a few minutes when he is at work. In fact, he may not even notice the time as he chats with you. Conversely, a man who hardly calls and talks incessantly about himself with little regard for you is not interested. Nor, is a man who rather conveniently only calls you at night for the sole purpose of talking about explicit matters.
2: He does not call you at the last minute - A guy that calls at the last minute to ask what you are up to or fails to make arrangements for your next meeting at least three days in advance could just be spontaneous and adventurous however, watch him over time to see whether he is genuinely calling you because he really wants to spend quality time with you or whether his previous plans have fallen through and you are his next best option.
3: Convenience - When you and your boyfriend meet up does it usually involve renting a movie and going back to his home where his bed happens to be close by? Whilst it is romantic to spend time indoors, if this is the usual pattern and your man fails to take you out watch him as he may not be serious about you and only seeks your company for his own convenience and gratification.
4: He makes time for you - As a guy falls for woman, he seeks to make her a priority in his life. His time spent enjoying football with the boys will take a back seat in favour of spending time with you. He will want to spend time with you and enjoy partaking in the things you enjoy doing.
5: He wants to impress you - A man who is serious about you will want to look his best in your eyes. He will begin to take note of the way he dresses, grooms himself and will genuinely want to improve himself. When in a department store, he may ask you your opinion when trying on new clothes. To him, your opinion is valued.
6: It is in the eyes - It is often said that when we are attracted to someone, our pupils dilate and this is so true. There may be times when you may catch your man off guard and he is staring at you with dilated eyes. The longer he holds his gaze sometimes demonstrates the affection he has for you. It could also be a lustful stare however, if he is showing you signs of commitment in your relationship, be assured that he is indeed serious about you.
7: He will go all out for you - You have a sick relative who lives miles away and its 4am in the morning. You urgently want to see them. A man who loves you will think nothing of going out of his way to do something that he knows means a lot for you. In some cases, he may forgo his own needs so as to put yours first and would not give a second thought to being there for you. In other areas of your relationship, he may find himself starting to like the things you like such as music artists, types of food wine, TV programmes.
8: He introduces you to family and friends - For most guys bringing you home to meet his parents and friends are a big deal for him and shows that he is serious.
9: He allows you to keep your things at his place - A man can be territorial, meaning that he likes his space in his home and does not like anything to infringe that. So to you, leaving your toothbrush at his home is no big deal but to him it is like you are making yourself at home. Now, if he is serious about you, he will not raise an eyelid to you doing this. In fact, he would not care if you left your whole make up bag, shoes and whatever else you chose to leave in his home. However, if he is not serious about you, he may just remind you to take your things when you leave.
10: He does not tell but shows you - Yes, you read right. A guy who is genuinely serious about you may not necessarily declare it but will show it by being consistent about his intentions towards you. He will be affectionate and romantic and not blow hot and cold nor leave you in the lurch without a valid reason. When he eventually feels confident to tell you know that he is serious about you, you would already know because his actions 'show' commitment and seriousness. Therefore whilst dating your guy watch his actions over a period of time to see if what he says and what he does match up. If not, you need to re-think your relationship.
11: 'I' becomes 'we' - When referring to himself does he often include you and say 'we' as though you are a couple. If he is thoughtful enough to mention 'we' it shows that he is no longer taking his needs solely into account and is beginning to truly value your relationship.
Samantha is a Certfied Life Coach specialising in career, parental and confidence building coaching as well as offering generic coaching. To find out more about this and to acquire further articles, please view http://www.positive-vision.co.uk.
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